The Things I Fight For…

Coming from Miss People pleasing , non-confrontational over here, I’m getting a bit riles up & I just need to type some of these things out to remind myself WHO and WHAT I’m fighting these continuous battles for and WHY I’m doing it… So, please indulge me.  

I’m fight for my Savior.  Because when He made me, He said I was good & complete. That I had sin in me, but He would cover that when I finally asked.  I fight for Jesus because He promised me that He was worth it, and I have little glimpses of proof and FULL faith that He’s right. 

I fight for my marriage.  We made a pact TOGETHER that we would NEVER STOP putting in the work it takes to be just one of the MANY examples of God’s love for His created people.  My partner… he makes me a better person and pushes me to do things I never knew I was capable of.  

I fight for my children.  Nathan & I together talk about the hard things. We take in credible information, we seek Godly consul, we read & we pray and we make decisions for our family.  Then we implement & teach them those things.  We screw up, of course, but those are lessons that need to be taught as well.  God entrusted these little warriors to us for a reason, and I don’t take that lightly.   

I fight for people. Each human (I believe) was made on purpose.  And whether you call it sin or call it being HUMAN, we have some really messed up stuff going on.  And I don’t care who you are or what you’ve done, I’m called to LOVE YOU! 

I’ve been told how to be a better Christian. I’ve been given pointers on how to be a better wife.  EVERYONE has something to say on how I should feed, teach, discipline, talk to, or raise my children. And the way people have blasphemed my business, my town, my community of people… It’s just ugly and messed up and makes some of the lessons I have to teach my girls REALLY hard to explain.  But I’m called to love you.   

Now, here’s where my biggest fight lies.  I’m no perfect specimen here.  I’ve contributed to the ugly.  A REACTION begins to bubble under my skin and my inner voice screams out for injustice and ignorance. It’s the SIN or being HUMAN (or whatever you prefer to call it)  masked under something someone else has said or done and it just gets my heart racing.  THIS is the hardest battle, BUT that’s not a battle I was asked to fight. So, instead, I internally battle it & respond with my ACTIONS, NOT my words.  REACTIONS, either words OR deeds, are still actions but they come mainly from deep emotions and with severely less control; AND, once ANY action is taken, it’s hard to retract.  

We are being bombarded with so many peoples’ heightened emotional REACTIONS to anything and everything.  The devil desperately wants us to engage in these verbal spats, but all I see is other HUMANS just like me losing some of their daily fights and DESPERATELY clinging to ANYTHING they can still control.  

So I cling to the ONE thing I can control.  My ACTIONS. So, tomorrow when I raise from my bed, I will bow to my knees and begin the fight again… for my Savior, for my marriage, for my children, and for you.